Audrey Grace

The days leading up to my C-section were so intense, counting down the days and knowing your life is about to change! I had contractions on and off for the last 2 weeks or so. Since Brent was in Utah until Sunday night and the c-section was scheduled for the following Thursday morning, I tried extra hard to lay down and rest so as not to go into labor when he wasn't home yet.

Brent made it here on Sunday evening with his mom and kids and I was so happy to see them after 2 1/2 weeks!

(Last picture as a family of 4)

The night before my c-section I didn't sleep very well. I woke up quite a few times, looking at my phone to see if it was time to go yet. We had to be to the hospital at 5:30am. I also was having minor contractions which I was feeling in my back. I was pretty nervous for the surgery, but not nearly as nervous as I was for Coen's. I was more nervous if the baby was really going to be healthy and OK. I had a huge fear that she was going to come out and just not be OK. In my morning scripture study before going to the hospital, I read in Ether 1. The verse has nothing to do with newborns, but these words spoke such peace to me "...And there will I meet thee, and I will go before thee into a land which is choice above all the lands of the earth." Going to the unknown is always scary for me, but I felt I needed to just trust, and this baby girl would be even better than we had imagined. Brent gave me a blessing and we left our house at 5:20am.

It's hard to explain how strange it is to drive to the hospital and know that in just a couple hours you will be meeting this little being that has been moving inside of you for so long. Our nurse, Bev, was awesome and we chatted and had fun as she prepped me for surgery.

When it was 7:30am, I walked across the hall to the operating room to get my spinal.

Brent had to stay in the hall for that part, but Bev came in and held me during it. The anesthesiologist was a female of Asian descent, and if I'm going to judge a book by a cover, I'll say I felt totally confident in her abilities :) She looked like she knew what she was doing. The spinal felt like two normal shots in my back- not a big deal. As soon as that was over and I was starting to go numb, they brought in Brent.

After cleaning my stomach, putting up the drape, and making sure I was good and numb, my doctor (who I love) began the surgery. I think it was about 2 minutes from the time she started cutting to the time we heard the baby cry. I heard the doctor say "oh, she's already starting to be born!" and then a second later, those glorious first baby cries- which made me cry a bit.

 (Brent stood up and watched the whole thing over the screen. I kept saying eew, don't watch them cut me! He thought the whole thing was fascinating though.)

I got a glimpse of the baby as they took her to the side for a second to suction out her mouth and wipe off some of the goop. Brent followed them while they were doing this, and I'll never forget, after looking at the baby, his huge grin back at me and two-handed fist pump like "YES!!!"

They brought the baby to my chest and I got to cuddle her for the next 20 minutes or so while I got stitched up. This was a super nice distraction since although you're numb, you still feel tugging and pulling, and it's not so pleasant to be cut open and then stitched up.

While my doctor and the other assistant were working on me, they were chatting, and then my doctor said to me "we're just admiring your abs. You have so many less layers to stitch up." Haha. I felt overwhelming gratitude for this sweet baby on my chest. We were surprised by her chubby cheeks and her rolls!

After this, they took the baby to be weighed and she weighed 7 lb 9 oz. There was an audible "wow!" in the room since we all (including the doctor) had guessed she'd be about a pound lighter. She was 20 inches long. Brent finally got to hold the baby and I loved watching him stare and smile at her.

We then went to the recovery room where I was surprised at how good at breastfeeding the baby was right off.

(Dr. Schnapper- love her!)

 After recovering for about 2 hours, they moved me to my hospital room. Pretty soon after, I got really nauseous and my body couldn't stop shaking, which I guess is a reaction that can happen after giving birth. I was pretty miserable for the whole afternoon, stuck in the hospital bed as I couldn't walk yet. Luckily Brent was there to hold Audrey since I felt too sick to hold her for a while.

Later that afternoon the kids and Tammy came to meet the baby. When it was Coen's turn to hold the baby, he did the same little excited fist pump that Brent had done earlier that day, haha.

I had been soooo excited to see the kids meet their little sister and I was kind of sad that I still felt so yucky, but it was still cute to watch.

Luckily Tammy was here to watch the older kids so that Brent could stay at the hospital with me over night and help me. (Thank you Tammy!) It was fun to have time with just the three of us in the hospital, and to get to know our new little daughter. Brent brought old movies with actresses whose names we were considering for the baby- Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Nick & Nora. The next couple days were wonderful, I kind of love my time in the hospital, being taken care of, and having the excitement of the new baby! Every time I would wake up in the night, I would see her and think ohhhh yes, I have a cute baby!

On Saturday night we decided on the name Audrey Grace for her. The nurses were helping us out and voting on names, and being kind of funny about it. One nurse was calling the baby Audrey, and one was calling her Nora. When they called her Audrey, it just seemed to fit!

We left the hospital just after lunch on Sunday. We felt so blessed to have a beautiful, healthy, sweet baby girl. I felt the sweet assurance I had felt when reading my scriptures the morning of her birth was more than fulfilled with this sweet girl.

Baby #3

Dear Baby #3,
You will be here in less than one week! I am so so so excited to hold you and see what you look like, and what your temperament is like. I wanted to write some things about this pregnancy while I'm still pregnant, since afterwards it gets kind of foggy. We'll treat is as a little Q&A (based on real questions I've gotten):

Was this planned? Yes. Beginning in early Spring 2018 we were thinking about adding another baby to our family, when I got called to be Primary President. It really threw me off and I felt confused on what to do. Brent left it all up to me. After praying about it and going to the temple, I felt like I needed to get healthier myself first- both physically and emotionally. I started a gluten-free diet which really helped me feel better, and I went to see a counselor for my anxiety that ebbs and flows throughout my life. Then in late Fall 2018, we prayed about it, discussed, and really thought hard about it. The time felt right.

(March 2019, about 20 weeks pregnant)

When did you find out you were pregnant? I tried to be sneaky and I bought a pregnancy test while Brent was at school. I took it the day before his birthday, and it was so hard not to say anything. On Brent's birthday (Dec 7) we had a date night and I put the positive test in a ziploc bag and wrapped it up. I thought I would surprise him, but we both basically already knew :) It was still fun to confirm it to him right on his birthday!

(Happy Birthday!)

Did you think it was a girl or boy? Based on the way I felt with morning sickness, I thought it felt like a girl, but I was just sure when I pictured our family, that we would have another boy. We were happy either way since we already had one of each! Our kids were the first people we told that we were expecting. We told them right before we got in the car to go to the ultrasound.

(March 2019- waiting in the doctor's office for the ultrasound to find out if it's a girl or boy)

Did you get sick? I did get pretty nauseous from about weeks 6-12. I did not throw up though, except for the night when I had the stomach flu on Christmas, when I was 7 weeks. That was the most miserable I have been in a really long time. This pregnancy has been way harder than Coen's. I had ZERO energy during the first trimester, my back hurt a lot earlier, and around month 5, I got pelvic girdle pain. My doctor explained that it's kind of like having arthritis in your pelvic joints. It hurt me to walk, or sit for a long period of time, or stand. Still, I know my pregnancy was easier than it is on most women. Even though I had a lot more pain this time, I still really enjoyed being pregnant, especially feeling the baby move. I felt proud and in awe of my body.

(January 2019- Coen laying by tired mom who doesn't feel good)

(March 2019- Her spine, from the 20 week ultrasound)

What did you crave? I craved fruit. Especially grapes. I ate a whole lot of grapes this pregnancy. Also, I craved ground beef. The only real aversions I had were any type of Asian food. Especially soy sauce in the beginning.

(January 2019- our first OB appointment. I was so relieved to see there was really a baby in there)

What do you think this baby will be like? I think she has to be in between Coen and Ava in terms of personality. They are so opposite from one another, there's no other way she could be more extreme than one of them! Based on her movement in me, she does feel somewhere in the middle- not nearly as hyper as Ava, perhaps slightly more active than Coen, or similar to Coen. I'm guessing she is going to be petite and take after me personality-wise.

(August 2019- just waiting!)

Are Ava and Coen excited? Ava is super excited to get a baby sister. The first time she felt the baby move in my tummy she gasped and got wide-eyed. It has been really fun to have an older child understand more. Coen is pretty excited, I think.... although he just keeps saying "I'm the baby!" and doing baby talk. 

And to conclude this post, we have some pictures by the month because I found my growing tummy completely fascinating. I have to admit, I couldn't stop staring at it in the mirror and taking pictures the whole 9 months. Look at what my body is doing! It is such a miracle, and it never gets old.
We start with Month 3 because that's when the bump begins to appear.

Month 3

Month 4

Month 5

Month 6

Month 7

Month 8

Month 9

We love you already, baby!